Sunday, 16 April 2017


When two people love each other, they share their joy, multiply their hope

(words from a poem I wrote for our wedding.)

Those early days after a first baby is born are a pivotal point in a marriage. You turn from facing inwards towards each other, and open up the circle, to look down at another. You stare and are consumed by this new being, and by the time, weeks or months later, when you finally look up at each other again, everything is different. Months, years go by, and you add in another child, or two, and you are stretched further from each other as you welcome in more new life.

They share their pain, divide their sorrow

We became parents in a rush, in a way we weren't expecting. In the midst of chaos you were calmness. I finally got to see you as a father, and days after our first was born, I wrote this

"He is so in love with her, a sweet, caring, gentle love you've never seen from him before. His face lights up when he sees her, he is enamoured with his daughter. He holds you when you cry, showers you while you still have a catheter in and are not strong enough to stand, stays home to look after you in bed and bring you toast and tea.... He really is your knight."

They walk alongside each other as they travel through life

Since then I have seen you parent in many ways- exhausted, wiping snot, poo, vomit. Rocking babies, quieting tantrums, playing hide and seek. Coming home from a day at work, and resetting yourself in a matter of moments, ready for the kids to climb on you, grab at you, need you.

When two people love each other, and hand in hand they vow their love, their is no tighter bond and none can break, weaken or fray it

When we finally get time together, it is not like before. Not long languid evenings, or mornings to chat and eat. Not weekends with nothing to do but drink coffee and garden and snuggle.

No, now our moments are snippets. We look at each other wearily once the kids are in bed and the chores are done's you. It's still you, the man I married. 

When two people love each other, they give all they have to the other, and step out into the beginning of their days

Through the pregnancies and fears, through the births and unknown, through the weariness and tears, the long nights and broken sleep, the monotony and relentlessness, toddler songs, dirty hands, baby slobber and wriggling nappy changes, through days at the park, days sick in bed, the summers the winters, the warmth and the cold, there you are.

Before we were interlocked closely, only looking at each other. Now we are stretched, pulled, as we look at our children. Our hands are still interlocked and the ups and downs of life try to pull us apart. In those moments I feel your hands grip mine tightly. You are not letting go. Neither am I.

They rest in each others arms, and that love is their home

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